27 February 2013


It is a requirement under all residential lease agreements here in Singapore to get one’s Air Conditioning units serviced every three months. This maintenance is compulsory and it is written into all residential lease agreements.

I have no problem with this. None at all. Air Conditioning is a must in Singapore as the heat and humidity is incessant. It often beats and belts me and smacks me around and it occasionally wears me down. Air Conditioners need to run at peak performance. 

I only have two small units in my little apartment. They are the evaporative type and they are known as 'packaged units'.

I don't know why. 

Whenever I am at home at least one of my Air Conditioning units is constantly humming. Sometimes both. I sleep with my bedroom unit on at full blast with the thermostat set at 24 degrees. I sleep beneath a sheet and a cotton blanket. My sheets are Egyptian and they have a thread count of 1000. I am not exactly sure what this means but they are soft and cool and crisp. I am normally attired in just my underpants when I sleep. I wear no pajamas.

Sometimes I am naked.

Pajamas is a funny word. The word pyjamas is derived from the Persian and Urdū languages. Pāë translates to foot or leg and Jāmah means clothing. So it is foot and leg clothing. Interesting huh?

I would have thought that this was a sock or a stocking - but it is not. 

I presume it is plural as in pyjamas rather than then singular pajama because there are two legs involved. But that’s just a best guess.

What do I know?

My air conditioning dudes are from a Company called Ezybreeze. I signed a one year contract with them for my quarterly servicing. I paid up front. This is the norm in Singapore.

Quarterly servicing and paying up front.  

There are dozens of AC companies to chose from and there may well be hundreds. It is a very competitive market. 

I selected Ezybreeze because I like the name. When my Air Conditioners are due for service Ezybreeze email me and ring me and SMS me too. They do this on a daily basis until I respond. They are incessant.

Like the Singaporean heat and humidity.

I rang them up on Monday and I spoke to Mr. Ezybreeze. He is a nice old chap.

I said, “Uncle I am ready for my AC servicing. When are you able to come over?

He replied “Wednesday. Can?”

I was busy on Wednesday morning with work appointments so I responded, “Sorry uncle. I am busy. Cannot. Howzabout Thursday?”

"Can" he replied. 

Done deal.

My cleaning Helper Mery will be at my apartment on Thursday so she can let the maintenance men in. The condensers for my AC units are mounted on brackets outside my apartment and to access them the maintenance guys must climb out my small kitchen window and balance on a narrow ledge. I am on the sixth storey of my complex and there are no safety rails outside. It is a silly design and makes for a dangerous task. When the guys have to re-gas the units they are literally hanging onto the window ledge with one hand and hooking up the gas with the other. It alarms me to watch this. It freaks me out.

It really does.

I always tell Mr. Ezybreeze to make sure that his guys are careful. I say to him, “Please uncle, make sure that your guys don’t fall to their death”.

Mr. Ezybreeze always snorts with some derision when I mention this and he replies, “Don’t worry Mr. Peter. My guys are always safety first.”

Despite Mr. Ezybreeze’s confident nonchalance in this matter I prefer not to be there to witness this hazardous activity. 

I am glad that Mery will be there instead.

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